Long days

Turmoil and stress would be a heartfelt description of my weekdays. Classes, homework, tests, deadlines, bad grades, lecture, lecture, lecture, come home and prepare for another similar day. Monday through Friday, I repeat this process and my joy grows darker and darker.

Come Saturday, I had mostly forgotten why I’m still a Christian and who I’m living for. I gladly take the blessing of Saturdays, but I somehow don’t enjoy it as I should. I’m stressed and it is very obvious that I am. Yet when I’m asked how I’m doing, I find it hard to answer. I really don’t know. I haven’t had the spiritual stamina to examine that. I might think for a while about how I’m doing, and all I’d come up with is a list of things that I need to do. A good hint that I’m anxious.

It’s a good thing weekends have Sundays. Pure joy would be my heartfelt description of Sundays.

Sunday comes, and I’m very ready for some spiritual edification. Praise God I have a church home. A day ago, I was trying to remember what God is like. Now, I’m standing in the third row singing Come Thou Fount and I remember just who I’m living for and why I’m doing this for Him. I can’t say it’s a tangible thought. It may just be a feeling, but the feeling makes me want to keep going through another week and to fight for joy throughout the hardships.

After I’ve enjoyed worship and been enriched by a gospel-centered sermon, I enjoy a rare treat for me: I get to indulge in watching and playing with kids. I walk down to SPLASH where Mr. C. has the kids busily bopping beach balls all around the room. The sheer simplicity of their enjoyment is enough to bring me joy.

There’s some young boys plotting something in the corner. Their grins can’t hide from me. Maybe they plan to thoroughly spray me down with juice boxes again. Maybe they’re going to trick someone into saying something stupid. Maybe they just want to find some big guy to jump on and tackle. I keep my eye on them so I don’t miss a second of their scheme.

One of my favorite little girls says “hi” to me. I go over and talk with her and ask her about how she’s doing. For just a little while, I enjoy her small little world about her friends, horses, her favorite movies, her last birthday party, the bracelet she’s wearing and completely forget about my world. I pray a silent prayer for this girl, that God would draw her closer and closer to Him and that her little world would be wholly immersed in God.

Time to leave church and go over to some friends’ house and watch a game of football with a large group of people. I have some homework, but I can still enjoy being with the people, watch the game, and study for my astronomy test. Eventually, the passion of the crowd wins me away from my academic adventure and I heartily cheer my Redskins to a proud victory. It truly is sweet fellowship.

Finally, I return home tired and simultaneously renewed. Yes, I barely have the mental capacity to write this, yet I feel strong enough to wrestle another beastly week.

Monday, by God’s grace, I am ready for you and your host of classes, homework, tests, deadlines, bad grades, lectures, lectures, and lectures. I’ll fight through you cause I know that just on the other side of Friday is Saturday, and right after that comes that precious day when I enjoy fellowship with God’s people.

My future, likewise I’ll fight through you because I know that just on the other side there is a Sabbath that will not end by giving me up to another hard week.